Sunday, January 30, 2011

Rego and Boz Should Expect:

I was trying to think of the best way to introduce Rego and Boz to the members of the league. Then I figured, instead of formal intro’s like; “I appletinis and long walks on the beach”… that the best thing would be to write up summaries that pretty much give you the gist of what everyone is about in this league. So who are the members of this league?
-          Joe will draft a closer in the 3rd round; he will have 4 closers before the 10th round. He will also draft Juan Pierre. After five years or mediocrity you think he would learn his lesson!
-          Dave will threaten to quit the league at least two times a year.  He will also use David III as his excuse for his failure in the league.
-          Steve H will still hold his #1 waiver spot for no apparent reason. He will squander in the middle of the pack because his team will bore him and the rest of the league to death. He also looks like THIS when he gets close to Brian Rose.
-          Duke will draft Josh Beckett in the 3rd round and will hold a minimum of 6 Red Sox players on his team. I bet he will draft Kalish in the 10th round. You heard it here first!
-          Steve D will weep when he gives up the championship trophy. He will also talk about how he has the best SS, Catcher and pitcher in baseball but inside he realizes his team is getting worse and worse every year.
-          Seth will make only two posts this year. In both posts he will try to justify a lopsided trade he made with his minor league team (Mike). Somehow he will get lucky enough to make the playoffs and win the league and all of us will be left scratching our heads.
-          Mike will be the easiest person to trade with…call me a dictator… Make at least 5 dumb trades. Will refer to Brandon Morrow as the next Nolan Ryan. And lastly he will try to rip the league apart just for pleasure. His political suggestions are about as bad as Jimmy Carter’s. Sorry for talking politics but I love politikin!
-          Brian will say he has had the best team last year because he finished 1st in the regular season, but fail to mention he finished 3rd (by far his best finish ever). He will also send everyone an email that says he is looking to make a trade and that all of his players are available. But he will also ask you to make an offer. When you make the offer he will call you stupid then ask for a first and second picksround in return.
-          Pat will make a reference to Brian’s bald head a minimum of 108 times. He will argue that Hanley will win him his championship. The past two years show that Hanley has only placed beer goggles on Pat. Sorry dude, but Hanley has made your team look like Adriana Lima when in actuality it looks more like Rosie O'donell.
-          Jeremy Yup, I guess I have to tell you about myself… The league thinks I look like THIS. In my eyes I look more like THIS.

Please feel free to add to this list!

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